Habit of Not Finishing Things

I have a habit of not finishing things. I’ve completed some things successfully such as schooling or making a particular song. But, I tend to leave many things unfinished. I have many unfinished songs on my computer. I’ve signed up for a few programs online such as a singing course, a Udemy Spanish course, a Success Triggers course by Ramit Sethi, and a Deep Abundance Integration course by Steve Pavlina. But, I haven’t gone through all of these programs to the end. I started them, and then I stopped progressing.

The problem with not finishing what I started is that I am never sure of the full effects or results of the program. For example, with that singing course, I have no idea what my full potential with singing is by following the full course. I haven’t practiced consistently. I signed up for that course a couple years back, and I’ve only gone through maybe the first two lessons. I guess I was looking for fast results and got bored quickly.

I would like to be more consistent. I would like to try something and finish it to the end to see what benefits it brings. That’s the only way to know how something can truly affect you, by finishing it to the end. Even if you only did 80% and feel like that’s enough, you don’t know what the remaining 20% can do for you.

I only have a partial idea of what stops me from completing certain tasks. For one, I can get bored and just fall out of the habit from boredom. It can feel hard to take up the task, especially if it doesn’t feel easy to do anymore. I lose the initial excitement. And if it’s a time-consuming task (and for me, that can be as little as 10-15 minutes), then I’m less likely to do it if I don’t feel enthused about it.

Well, that actually might be the full reason why. I just get bored. I rarely do things unless I want to. It’s hard to get me to do something if I don’t feel like doing it. That’s why I don’t have a typical 9-5 job. Unless it’s some kind of work that I would enjoy, I wouldn’t be able to stick to it.

Sometimes, I wish I were more disciplined so that I could see if something benefits me through sticking to a commitment. I guess there are ways to build self-discipline, though I haven’t looked into it much. Steve Pavlina talks about 30-day trials, and even 30-day super trials. The regular 30-day trials are just making a commitment to do something every day for 30 days without fail. And if you miss a day, you start the 30-day trial all over again. I’ve tried this a few times, but I haven’t succeeded in a single one of these. The super trials are for those who can get the hang of 30-day trials and want to do multiple tasks in a single day for 30 days in a row. Or, it’s for people who get bored of just making a single change but would feel more motivated to make several changes. I don’t think I can do that because I feel pretty averse to change these days. I just like to stick to my comfort zone. It’s sad, but that’s what I’ve been accustomed to these days because of dealing with hearing voices. I have little tolerance. I don’t like dealing with a lot of change at once. It has to be pretty gradual, or I feel stressed out.

For now, I’ll just stick to blogging every day. Maybe that will build up my discipline. I didn’t blog this morning because I had no idea what to write. So, I’m writing this blog post in the afternoon. I would like to stick to writing every morning if possible, just so I don’t forget and so I can get that habit out of the way early in the day.

Eventually, I can go back to these online courses and get through each day. I’m not sure what to start with. Maybe Success Triggers would be easier to start with because the videos are fairly short. I could even write a review on it. And since it’s about changing your inner psychology, maybe it’ll even give me ideas on how to successfully finish other things and how to keep the momentum going.